The following 25 poems were all written by me. These are copyrighted and should not be used without my permission. The newest poems are posted on the bottom of the page.

September 14, 02
I thought...

I thought I knew you.
I thought you were the perfect one.
But I was wrong.
I have always said no one's perfect.
Yet I thought you were.
Nobody's perfect.
Even if they seem like they are.
I have learned my lesson.
I didn't learn it the hard way.
But you disappointed me.
I thought you were better than that.
You don't seem like that type of person.
But once again,
I was wrong.

September 17, 02
Tonight's the Night

Tonight's the night
I want you here by my side
putting your arms around me
kissing my cheek and neck softly
whisper those three magic words
and mean it.

Tonight's the night
I dream of you
to put on my wings
and yours
and fly away together
to a neverending dreamland.

Tonight's the night
I remember
all those wonderful memories
and to remember
how you broke my heart
into little pieces.

Tonight's the night
I will keep you
in my heart
while I move on
and try to
stop loving you.

September 21, 02
Wishing Upon A Falling Star

It's midnight
I sit by my window
staring out and staring up
up into the black sky
filled with stars
and wishes
and dreams.

I wish of you
to be here
I dream of you
to hug me
I wish if you
to kiss me
I dream of you
to hold me
forever
and never let me go.

I look harder
and found a falling star
which I pour
all my dreams and wishes to
and hope that
the flying angel
will make them
come true.

September 21, 02
Why?

Why?
Why did you have to be so nice?
Why did you have to be so sweet?
Why did you have to be so fun?
Why did you have to be so smart?
Why did you have to be so charming?
Most of all,
Why did you steal my heart?

September 27, 02
You Shattered My Heart

The first time I met you
You took my heart away
You were so sweet to me
I fell in love with you right away

You had my hopes up
For a chance of
a great love
A love I will cherish
for the rest of my life

But then you held my heart
and dropped it
shattering it everywhere
breaking it
into small pieces

And now I'm left here
all alone
crying
hurting
broken hearted
all because of you.

October 8, 02
Missing Out

Your face shows caring
your eyes shines bright
Your arms so strong
your body so warm.

You have no idea how you make me
feel when you look me in the eye
You have no idea how you make me
feel when you give me a warm hug.

I wish you were mine
You're so perfect
Never have I met
someone so nice and sweet
I've never wanted anyone this bad.

But you don't feel the same
You only feel friendship
I only pray that one day
You won't wake up and be hurt
realizing you had missed a chance with me.

A chance of a great love
A love that stays warm in your heart forever
Someone so caring and loving to you
You feel like you're in heaven.

October 12, 02
I Lied

I said I'm over you
I lied
I'm not
I told the world I was fine
I put on a face
and smile
like I always do
People say I'm the sweetest
and that I'm always happy
But they don't see the person
behind that smile
The real me
who cries all the time
and had her heart broken
by you.
Shame
on
you.

October 14, 02
That Image

I'll never forget that image
When I saw them carry you away
Eyes closed,
head down
You were helpless

You had no idea how I felt
No words can describe it
All the feelings inside me
Mixed up together

What happened?
Why did you do it?
Will you be ok?
Will I ever see you again?

I pray and pray
I hope and hope
I wish and wish

That I will see you again
at school tomorrow
for our regular morning walk
my love.

October 19, 02
Crying

I learned some news this afternoon,
nothing too shocking really.
With my luck,
I should have expected it.
He broke my heart again.

I thought of killing myself
I'm so tired
of not being appreciated
and being unloved.

I went outside for a walk
my tears and the cold breeze
made my contacts blurry
I went back home soon
laid on my bed
thought of you
and cried some more.

October 20, 02
Where Are You God?

She was always at taught
to believe in God.
Baptized when only a week old
Church every Sunday morning
Altar girl for give years
She prays evrey night
before falling asleep

But right now
she's mad at God
This past year
she's been through much
Things got worse
never better

So she asks,
Where are you God?
Why are you so cruel?

October 21, 02
All This Time

All this time
he's been looking for
that one person.
That one girl
that makes his
heart beat faster
than those race cars
can ever go.

Someone oh so sweet!
So nice, wonderful and caring
So funny he couldn't
help but laugh loudly.

His dream came true
when she kissed him
while sitting on the roof
under the sea of stars.

October 21, 02
Being Himself

He's only 15.
A sophomore at school.
Taking honors classes
playing a lot of sports
Don't forget student government
and homecoming prince.

He's always smiling
so happy, so cheery
But there's a side of him
A side which no one knows of.

No one knows
he cries and cries
every night before sleep.
Why?
Because he hates himself
He hates putting on a face every morning
He just wants to be himself.

October 22, 02
Dot

Christmas morning was his favorite
Waking up to the sweet smell of fire
The tasty hot chocolate
and the presents under the tree.

He opened his one and only present
He didn't mind recieving only one
He was never greedy
A tiny brown puppy leaped up
Licking his laughing face.

He named her Dot
and cared for her everyday
He plays with her
walks her and cleans her
with no complaints.
She sleeps with him
everynight.

He soon grew up
Many times forgetting Dot,
spending much time
at school and with friends.
But Dot never forgot him.
She was always there for him
to cheer him up
and be by his side.

But still he forgets her
It was until that day
that Dot died
that he realized
he's lost his one true
best friend.

The one who was always
there for him
when he needed someone.

October 26, 02
Still There

You've made my cry
You've ignored me
You've got my hopes up
You've also break my heart.

But I just want you to know
That I still care about you
even after all this time,
and after everything you
put me through.

Don't ever hesitate
to talk to me
I'll always be here for you
no matter what.

I'll still love you
no matter what.
I'm stuck on you.

October 26, 02
I Wonder

Often at night
I stay awake
and wonder
where is my life going

Am I doing the
right things?
Am I hanging out
with the right friends?

But I most often
thought about you
I would wonder
about what would happen
if we do get together

I'd smile for a moment
But then I'd cry,
You don't like me that way.

October 27, 02
My Turn

You've been there for me
through ups and downs.
I'd cry, you'd smile.
You're stay with me
until I too, smile.

You gave me hugs
when I needed it.
You were always
so strong for me.

But now you're crying
I walk over to you
Kiss you on the cheek
and hug you.

It's my turn to be you.
My turn to be your friend.

November 10, 02
You Can't See Me

I can see you from far away
my eyes traveling as you walk
saying hi to people you know
smiling, your eyes sparkles

I stood to the side
as you walk closer to me
you can't see me
only I can see you

Oh how I want to hold you
so close to my heart!
Oh how I wish
you can see me!
I want to tell you
that I love you!

December 10, 02
It's Winter

Soft thumps can be heard
outside my window.
Oh my - what is it?
I left up my blanket
and out on my pink heart slippers.
I put my hand against the curtains
and pushed the silky material
to each sides of the window.
That's when I saw
the most beautiful thing.
The pure white snow
was whiter than paper.
It was whiter than the clouds.
It was whiter than milk.
It was as white as the snow can be.
Winter is finally here.

July 19, 03
Lying

you stand infront of me
thinking you know me
talking to me

lecturing me
giving me a speech
thinking you're better

shut up
leave me alone
let me be myself

maybe if you'd try
to get to know me
I'd feel better

and you can actually say
that you know me
and not be
lying

July 26, 2003
Alone at the Beach

Walking down the beach
sand between toes
grasping, holding on

Sun setting
creating an orange glow
beginning of night

Wrap my arms around me
Hug my sweater tighter
Body feels lighter

Walking alone
missing you
by the ocean

July 26, 2003
I Only Love You When...

Why would you think
I only love you when
we're hugging?

Why would you think
I only love you when
our faces touch each other's?

Why would you think
I only love you when
we taste each other's lips?

Why would you think
I only love you when
we're both in the same room?

Why would you think
I only love you when
we sit under the stars at night?

Why would you think
I only love you when
you hold me at night?

Why would you think
I only love you when
we wake up together?

Don't think that

It was never true
It is not true
It will never be true

I love you then
I love you now
I love you forever

July 27, 2003
Give Up

Whoever knew
it'd be so hard
to give you up

You've invaded me
my thoughts
my feelings
my heart

Times we spent together
talking
crying
laughing

You've gone away now
left me with
a shattered heart

Gotta give you up
sooner
or later.

August 18, 2003
Welcome To The Mind Of A 16 Year Old Girl

Three bedroom house.
Three colored room.
Pink, purple, blue.

Big desk.
Laptop with Snoopy background.
CD player next to it.
In CD player is John Mayer.
He's sexy.

There's a water bottle.
It's filled with sand.
I got it from Santa Cruz.
When my friends and I went
on Thursday.

Dark brown hair, dark brown eyes.
5'5", 120 pounds.
Shirt and jeans.
Flip flops and a purse.
Sunglasses is a must.

White Car, Honda Accord.
1997, 5 disc changer.
American flag dog tag
hanging on the mirror.

Senior in high school.
Journalism or public relations.
SDSU or JSU.

Underneath my hair
and the skin
rests my brain.
Underneath my clothes
and the skin
lies my heart.
Laughed a lot.
Torn more.
Broken many times.

What you see
may be what you get.
But don't judge me
by what you see.

Because when you see me
it is not all you get.
You only see my appearance
but there are these feelings
compressed, alone, unthought
inside of me
waiting to burst
waiting to be free.

Laughters, tears.
Sad, happy.
Moody, PMS.
Procastinator, lazy.
Boredom, school.
Family, Friends.
Hate, Love.

Welcome to the mind of a 16 year old girl.

August 19, 2003
Too Bad

I wish I could cry all the time
I wish my tears would never dry up
I wish I could talk to someone
I wish I could be truly honest
I wish things were easy to say
I wish I can just blurt out these words
I wish you'd understand

Too bad wishes don't come true.

My eyes are all dry now...no more tears to cry.

August 29, 2003
Still Alone

all alone in my room
laid down on my bed
started crying
listening to a song
Suicidal Dream
by Silverchair
been holding back
the tears
the burns
the yearns
the hurting
tonight's breakdown
is just one of many
I couldn't hold it anymore
couldn't hang on
couldn't control myself
even after all
the tears dried up
I still feel miserable
still depressed
still feel like
a fucked up
piece of shit
who's worth nothing
who's loved by no one
and of course
still alone